Jesus Eats at Uno's

Brandi has been all over me to post this, but I have been delaying as long as I could in hopes of instigating our first huge fight. But, since it has nothing to do with drugs, money, or infidelity, I haven't had much luck getting her pissed off so I might as well just do the damn post (I guess I'll have to cross "delayed posts" off of her red button list).

A couple of weekends ago, we went to Denver. It was just a simple weekend trip, but man it was great. In fact, it was so great that I find myself filled with the desire to not pay bills so that we can afford to do it at least once a month (just kidding sweetie... maybe).

The flight to Denver was short and sweet, but not short enough. You see, the first thing on the action item list was to eat lunch at Uno's. From my perspective I did not merely have to wait for an hour long plane ride. I had waited for years. There used to be one in Tulsa, but Brandi decided to get all noble and she outed one of the managers for sexually harassing one of her co-workers. So instead of simply finding another manager, the owners decided that the best course of action was to close shop*. Therefor, it is only on trips to distant lands that I can grace the halls of Uno's. Fortunately for me, this happened to be one such trip. (Oh yeah, Brandi likes Uno's too... and Jesus eats there from time to time as well)

We got off of the plane and made it to the car rental lot where we were given a full size Yukon for the price of an Aveo... high five (in my best Borat voice)! Next stop: Uno's. I, of course, had the Chicago Classic, which happens to be the only choice. Brandi had this chicken thing that she gets every time. I'm not sure why she gets it, because her version of it is ten times better when she cooks.

After we finished eating, we went to a rats nest that some people call a hotel. Actually, I don't think it would have been too bad if there hadn't been 50 kids on our floor. I think they were on some type of church youth group trip. In fact, it had to be that, because only kids on a youth group trip are that loud and annoying at two in the morning. And nothing against youth group kids... they can't do anything about their hormones... its not their fault. Jimmy likes Suzy, who has a crush on Jimmy's best friend Mike. But the thing is, Mike likes Veronica because, lets face it, Suzy is ugly. Veronica likes everyone because all she wants is her first kiss, but the problem there is that none of the guys will talk to her because she is the hottest chick in church... I mean none of them have a chance! "But how do you know this Ab?" Because, dear reader, they were yelling and screaming that crap up and down the halls all night long... and because Mike is a metaphor for me when I was in youth group. Damn.

After checking in, we made our way to Coors Field to catch the visiting Braves take on the Rockies. Coors is one of the nicest ballparks I have visited to date. We got our hats at the pro shop and then made our way to the concession stand praying that they wouldn't have that "coliseum dog" crap like Oakland. Huzzah! They had good old fashioned hot dogs (Brandi was happy like a fat kid. But what can I say? What my baby wants, my baby gets.)

The game was a lot of fun. We had great seats behind home plate which granted us quick access to concessions and restrooms. John Smoltz was on the bump for Atlanta and he performed very Smoltz-like. He pretty much shut them down for 7 and 2/3. But lets face it, Brandon and Lori's infant son could shut down the Rockies... but that's neither here nor there. The game was great. In fact (and Brandi agrees with this), I would say that this was the best trip that we have taken so far in our 3+ years together.

In closing: Uno's heavenly. Youth group raging hormones. Hot dogs American style. Great seats. Nathan is better than an MLB team.



*Brandi has reportedly regretted the direction of her moral compass ever since. I mean, who cares if some girl is "a little uncomfortable"... they have great food!